Jun 7, 2009

broken spirit

I just cant imagine living with IC for the REST of my life! The hubby and I are barely intimate because of this stupid disease and I know it affects us because everyone needs to be intimate. He is so good at understanding and loving me no matter what but still everyone has needs. I am just so scared one day he is going to wake up and realize I am not worth it anymore. I know he's not that type of man and he is a lot better than that but still you never know now a days. I just wish I could do the things that everyone I know can do. I want to eat the things everyone else can eat.

This disease is taking a toll on my spirit and my life emotions. I try being strong but it is so hard when I just want it to go away. I hate taking 2 hours to grocery shop because I have to read the labels. I know everyone has something wrong with them and they have medical problems too but I just feel like I am alone out here and I feel like it is never going to go away. I just wish how I even got this disease, all I know is when I became a "women" is when it all went down hill for me. I just needed to vent to feel somewhat better about my body.


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