so i got a call from my dad yesterday. his voicemail made me cry because he said he has read my entrys on my blog and it was good insight for him and he was sorry that he has disappointed me in the past and he doesnt do drugs anymore && he left his girlfriend. I just dont know if i should believe him. He has lied so much to me and straight to my face that words dont mean shit to me anymore. Hes gonna have to PROVE to me hes changing. And some ways are Getting a job, paying his own bills, leaving the friends he hangs out with, sell his boat and get an apt. I mean hes going to be 54 in March and he has not done the above for years! I wish i had a cush life and just have someone pay my way while I shoot up drugs! i dunno i really hope they entrys do help him and help him realize what a great life he is missing out on. What a great daughter && son he is missing out on & there lives. well actually see if he gets us christmas gifts that are just gift cards that our nana said was from him. Ugghh WHY CANT HE JUST TAKE A STEP BACK REALIZE EVERYTHING AND CARE?!?!?!? i know its the drugs and they get in the way but i HATE that its been his excuse my WHOLE life!
I pray to god all the time that he will save my dad but i think god has tried too many times and just gave up and im about to too. if he cant PROVE to me hes off drugs && not around his friends then hes out of my life for good! But if he can then that would probably be the happiest day of my life you wouldnt even know what that would mean to me, i cant even describe it!