HELLOOO THERE!!!!

WOW it has been like 486543596831 million years since I blogged! I have missed blogging and I have so much to update you all on. 


I am doing another semester of school this fall. I got approved for the full amount of the pell grant and free daycare through the state of California. I am super duper excited about that and can not wait for the fall semester now. I am doing nursing and business degree. 


Baby girl is 2 months old and is growing like a weed. She is going through diapers like they grow on trees. I am looking into cloth diapering and getting pretty excited for that as well. She still has all of her hair and is just getting more of it! :) She is starting to get blonde roots which makes me laugh she is hopfully finally going to look like her mama! 


I FINALLY got  a hobby and that is Couponing/THRIFTY! I am super excited to start this and have been researching and getting coupon stack in order. I will post pictures and everything once I start doing it and getting my stash full. I am not going to be so extreme like the TLC tv show but I do want free stuff like they have. And I do want to stock up on items we need so we arent constantly buying them or running out of them :)


Jason and I are doing great! We have taken on the mommy and daddy roll so wonderfully and I wouldnt change anything! We are happy healthy and so in love with each other and our little family that we have. We are paying off all our debts and getting financially ready to buy a place here in SoCal. I am so ready for this chapter of my life and I have embraced it fully. Some people say we are "rushing" it but we have been friends for 10 years, together for 8 months and raising a 2 month old child. I say to them that we are now figuring it out :) 

Well I better go back to printing out coupons and figuring out my shopping list! 

my miracle

So I am still in shock and awe that this beautiful little girl came out of me. I was told I was never going to have children and 5 years after hearing that news I had come to the conclusion that I was okay with it. I was okay with being a great Aunt and Cousin. Then BAM I wind up pregnant, and I was beyond thrilled. She truly is a miracle to me, growing inside of me for 9 months and coming out with no health problems. I am truly blessed and every time I look down at her I just cry happy tears. When I feed her it is the most amazing time for me, it makes my bond with her that much stronger. 

I want to be her best friend, the person she can always come to with her problems. Someone she can  trust and never break promises. I want her to be able to tell me anything and not feel ashamed or feel like I am judging her. I want her to learn from my mistakes and have a great bright future. She is my whole entire world and I would do anything for this little girl. When she smiles at me, it just melts my heart. She truly is amazing.

And I couldnt ask for a better partner in raising her. He has embraced it so well and she is his whole entire world too. He has been there since day one and has been such an amazing support system for me. He truly is an amazing man and I am glad I can call him my best friend of ten years and my boyfriend. He does poopy diapers, he tries talking to her when shes fussy, he kisses her all the time. He is simply amazing.

Well I am going to go lay down, we were up cluster feeding all night so I need to get my rest for today. Thank you for all my followers that stuck around even when I wasnt blogging, I appreciate it!

xoxoxo nikki

God's Plan......

I have always believed it but with my plan from God unraveling it just makes me believe even more with my soul that God is always with us. It just sucks that there are people out there that will always judge my life and my decisions I make in it. I just wish some people would just be happy for me. I understand that my situation isn't ideal but still that shouldn't matter, they should be happy for me. I don't even feel like I can really express myself on my blog because it will just start crap that I don't have enough energy to start.

I am happy with my life, my decisions, and the way I am growing up.  I have made the best decisions for myself and my life and at the end of the day thats all that matters. But you see, I have always been the people pleaser and I am just sick of doing it. If I speak my mind I have too much backlash so I don't ever talk about it unless you are one of the very few people I tell.


It still breaks my heart that my little brother, Shaun is not speaking to me. He doesnt believe in me having this child which I cant even comphrend. And he has deleted me off facebook and that is just ridiculous because we are family no matter how much we fight. I just dont get him sometimes. All I want his for him to get  a job, finish high school and get himself on the right path. But when he cusses me out, and speaks to me like I am a POS, it hurts my heart and makes me want to not speak to him. I hope he realizes everything and realizes how selfish and childish this all is.

I have had a best friend for almost ten years! His name is Jason Arrollado and he is just a great guy. Of course I am going to say that about my best friend haha. But we have spoken probably almost everyday over the years and I never get sick of talking to him. We make each other laugh when we both want to cry. We know each other in and out probably better then we know ourselves. And for once in my life it doesn't make me scared that a man in this world knows everything about me; good, bad, silly, stupid, un-sexy, sexy, smart, not so smart, and so on. It doesn't make me want to hide anything about myself or change myself because he is my best friend because of who I am. Maybe they are right, your supposed to marry your best friend. haha But now I am truly finding that is a very true statement.

After being married and divorced I dont think being with someone for a year(s) will make the marriage better or make it worse. Yes I believe in knowing someone before you think about my marriage but I hate how society has made us believe that you should date for X amount of years, be engaged for X amount of years and then get married. Then wait X amount of months/years before having a child. How does society know your life, or your relationship or anything like that? How do they know your friendship of X amount of years/months turned into something more then a friendship and y'all want to take that next step in your life. How can anyone judge your life or think they know what is best for it if they are not in your shoes. Yes of course taking advice but doesnt mean you HAVE to follow that advice. Trust me I am all about proving the skeptics wrong, I dont mean to be that way it just happens. It pushes me to prove them wrong.

Sorry all of this has been weighing heavy on my heart and mind I just needed to get it out. For how outspoken I am, I have surprised myself that I keep a lot in. In fear of pissing  people off and then judging me and talking behind my back. I know pathetic. Lets justs say, if you dont approve of my lifestyle or the decisions I make, please do not write or post or read my blog. Thank You.


Well its almost my bedtime, yes I know I go to bed early haha. This baby just takes all my energy away from me! Sorry for such the LONG posts haha. PS I will be 11 weeks tomorrow!!!!!! :)